I don’t know what it’s like to not be ADHD, but I have found that this consistent drive in me to keep moving, to take risk, to confront people and events in my life (just a few of the traits associated with ADHD) moves me closer towards my own personal realization. To be ADHD serves me, in so many ways… every single day.
And even if you don’t have ADHD, your world is very different because of people with ADHD who get stuff done, think of new and interesting ways to do it, and enthusiastically enroll you in the outcome. So seek us out – and when you find us, celebrate us. And if you’re up for it, jump on for the ride. We may not take the direct path to get where we’re going, but you won’t ever be bored. We may blurt out how we feel and declare our thoughts without coloring our words, but at least you will know where we stand and we’ll ask the same from you, encouraging you to be so bold as to put yourself ‘out there’, take your own set of risks and trust the ride.
Basically – if you happen to be ADHD, live with someone who is, work with someone who is or have any friends with ADHD, you’re one of the lucky ones. Welcome to our club. It isn’t always easy but it’s never boring.
Oh my god.. my poor parents. Growing up in a military household in the 50’s and 60‘s with my parents wasn’t easy. Try as they might, they couldn’t understand why their little girl was so difficult! Without the ‘container‘ of an ADHD diagnoses (the disorder wasn’t identified until the 70’s) they had little explanation as to why I refused sit still, talked non-stop, and pushed every button I came across, literally & figuratively. I honestly think they wanted to do the right thing, they just didn’t know what they were dealing with, much less how to cope with it. I was classified as hyperactive for beginners which might have given them some relief to have a name to hang my behavior on, but it still didn’t explain all those other quirky character traits I kept exhibiting. I just remember always going to and from different doctors, being admitted to a hospital at one point for psychological testing and therapy to help figure out what was wrong with me. ‘Fixing me’ became the goal. I needed ‘help’. And how would they know if I was better? It was pretty clear to me at the time…. they were hoping I would stop talking back, do as I was told, respect authority, complete projects, be less promiscuous, drive slower, be less impulsive….and on and on. Basically, be less me.
So, I said to myself at 17 – If you don’t know who you are then go looking until you do, because how are you going to love yourself if you don’t know who you are? And away I went…..
………. Cut to now, at 55 years old – happy in my skin – looking back at what I went through to get here. I made it through –
the huge and scary car crashes
the huge array of drugs
the battered wife syndrome
the multiple ex-husbands
the living on the move
the single parenting
the work I did to see myself
the not holding back
the surrendering to love
the realization of how it all works
the outcome of getting it right
the desire to share what I know
And all the possibilities that go with that knowing.
And I’ve come to understand, I wouldn’t be who I am had I been born ‘regular’.